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Hey Nintendo, Did you Forget How to Make a Handheld?
Posted by Lazlo Falconi
Posted on 28 August, 2013 at 1:04PM ↑ 1 ↓ 0
Hey Nintendo, Did you Forget How to Make a Handheld?

According to Engadget, Nintendo plans to release a new, cheaper handheld this fall, titled oh so cleverly the Nintendo 2DS, since it functions like a 3DS, but without the 3D aspect. First of all, isn't this a bit confusing? Will the general public, who Nintendo seems to be going after lately, be able to figure out that the Nintendo 2DS will play 3DS games? Will they even notice the difference? 

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fan of 3D, and it's probably the aspect of my 3DS that I care least about, but really Nintendo, this is more of a cop out that the DS Lite. At least that improved over the previous incarnation of the device. But this... First of all, it removes, really the defining feature of the device, and then gets rid of the handy-dandy clamshell design that protected the screens and has defined how handhelds look since 2003! 

I love Nintendo, I really do, and that's why I feel the need to say this. Nintendo, Iwata, come here... Just, come on. Little closer... *SLAP* Ahem... Do you see what you're doing here? Just look at this mess. How can you even think this is acceptable? I understand you want to make a cheaper option for poor families who need to play the next chapter in Cooking Mama, but come on guys, did you even try? Did you? And wouldn't it be cheaper to just use the existing 3DS molds? Why does it need to look so... So... I mean.. Guh.

Look at the clunky design. It almost looks like a Game Gear, except the Game Gear was actually, uhh... What's the word... Oh yeah, innovative for its time. Are you trying to cash in on the tablet market? Is that what's happening here? I got sour news for ya gramps, this ain't a tablet, and even if it was, I don't think anybody would want the dual screen mechanic of it.

But I'm being a bit unfair, and I like to give credit where credit is due. They did fix one of the biggest nagging issues of the 3DS. They finally remembered that the Start and Select buttons need to be somewhere that you can actually touch them without having to take your hands away from the action. Thanks Nintendo, it's a bit too late though, especially since you're only doing it on this monstrosity.

Here ya go guys. I've taken the liberty of drawing up a mockup for a new console that would actually benefit gamers, and maybe get some actual buzz other than, "Hey look Nintendo made a new handheld. Again." You can have this one for free, heck, you don't even need to mention my name because this is something you should have done a long time ago. In fact, if this happened, it would be the first Nintendo I bought at launch since the original DS dashed my hopes and dreams completely. Until then, I'll just be sitting over here in the dark, pretending the 3rd pillar still exists...


Gameboy Evolution

Lazlo Falconi
28 August, 2013 at 1:10PM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

Haha oops I forgot I wanted to put two speakers on there to make it stereo, oh well!

28 August, 2013 at 3:40PM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

29 August, 2013 at 07:44AM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

Cool, a DS that doesn't fit in your pocket, can't play GBA games, still only has one analogue pad and no doubt the terrible quality speakers that their handholds have always had.


Lazlo Falconi
29 August, 2013 at 08:34AM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

>not using headphones in your handhelds

Lazlo Falconi
29 August, 2013 at 08:35AM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

Interesting phenomenon, Captain. RotW makes links from filenames, and yet there's no way to upload files directly to a post.

29 August, 2013 at 11:53AM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

I presume it interprets the filename.jpg as a URL like

Note I didn't write the script that does this.

30 August, 2013 at 10:22AM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

Hey, I'm just saying it'd be nice to have the option.

7 October, 2013 at 7:23PM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

I'm still waiting for the 1DS.

Lazlo Falconi
8 October, 2013 at 9:27PM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

It only has one screen and is backwards compatible only with CDI games.

26 October, 2013 at 7:26PM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

Kids have a habit of breaking clamshell devices (3DS), 2DS fixes this issue while making it cheaper. Also released alongside Pokemon X & Y, which is HUGE with younger kids.

Lazlo Falconi
26 October, 2013 at 10:39PM ↑ 0 ↓ 0

This is true. Also, since I wrote this, it came out that it was actually one screen, which is obviously what makes it cheaper.

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